Shameless Pile of Stuff

Ringu 0: Bâsudei (a.k.a. Ring 0: Birthday)

Kadokawa Shoten, Horizon Entertainment, Japan, 2000.

The video tape curse lives on. 30 years before the events of the first film reporter Akiko Miyaji (Yoshiko Tanaka) interviews Sadako's (Yukie Nakama) former teacher Mrs. Sudo (Kazue Tsunogae). She wants to write an article about Sadako's psychic abilities. The story Sudo tells gives many answers to the obscure things of "Ringu" and "Ringu 2."

Akiko Miyaji

Sadako

Sadako is a shy and quiet girl. She has joined a theatre group. She is talented but is thought to be a freak. The star of the play Aiko Hazuki (Kaoru Okunuki) does not like her. Sadako goes to psychiatrist because she has scary visions. The members of the theater group begin to see weird dreams. Aiko dies mysteriously and Sadako gets the main role in the play. Sadako gains attention of sound engineer Hiroshi Tôyama (Seiichi Tanabe) which makes Etsuko Tachihara (Kumiko Asô) jealous. Also director Yûsaku Shigemori (Takeshi Wakamatsu) makes advances toward Sadako.

Etsuko Tachihara

Hiroshi Tôyama

Yûsaku Shigemori

Weird things happen. Rumours arise that Sadako caused Aiko's death. However the truth is more complicated as there is a good Sadako and an evil Sadako! Good Sadako can use her paranormal skills to healing. As Sadako is pushed, her evil powers awake. Mob justice leads to the inevitable tragic end.

Sadako's evil side

The last part of the original "Ringu" trilogy fills many of the gaps left open in the previous films. As such it is a satisfying finale and a good prequel. Again the story starts very slowly before reaching the horrifying climax. Mostly this is more psychological drama than horror. The plot has slight similarity to "Carrie" in some scenes although the revelation about Sadako near the end takes the story to more supernatural direction. We see the sympathetic side of Sadako and what finally pushed her over the edge and made her evil side take control of her.

The director changed for this part. Maybe Ogata's style is a bit more straightforward than Nakata's as the story is easier to follow than "Ringu 2." Also music by Shin'ichirô Ogata is quite different than Kenji Kawai's but still works well.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Kazue Tsunogae, Atsuko Takahata, Yoshiko Tanaka, Yukie Nakama, Seiichi Tanabe, Kumiko Asô, Takeshi Wakamatsu, Ryûshi Mizukami, Kaoru Okunuki, Yasushi Kimura, Mami Hashimoto, Daisuke Ban, Masako, Norio Murata, Kôji Yano, Hinata Takamine, Tasuku Unô, Akira Igarashi, Kôji Nakano, Kanji Watanabe, Senzaburô Makimura, Shûichirô Idemitsu, Yoshiyuki Morishita, Tsukasa Kimura, Akane Tachibana, Mahito Ôba, Yôji Tanaka, Manabu Kadowaki, Chinami Furuya, Tsuyoshi Shimada, Yukimi Koyanagi
Director: Norio Tsuruta

he DVD contains also short movie "Rings" that is the introduction to the world of "Ring 2."

Rings

Catchlight Films, 2005, USA.

A subculture has been formed around the killer videotape. People want supernatural experiences and they must show the tape to someone else in seven days or Samara's ghost will kill them. Jake (Ryan Merriman) wants to see how close the seven day limit he can go. The visions get more scarier and he begins to see Samara everywhere. Will someone agree to watch the tape before it is too late?

It is an interesting short film and a fresh take on the video tape curse phenomena. Still Ring 2 does not fully connect with it as huge plot holes follow.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Ryan Merriman, Emily VanCamp, Kelly Stables, Alexandra Breckenridge, Josh Wise, Justin Allen,
Andrew D'Amico, Dusty Sorg

Director: Jonathan Liebesman

Ring 2 (a.k.a The Ring Two)

DreamWorks SKG, BenderSpink, Parkes+MacDonald Image Nation, USA, 2005.

(There's no title card!)

Just minutes before the deadline Jake (Ryan Merriman) shows his friend Emily (Emily VanCamp) the deadly video tape. Emily does not dare to watch it, too bad for Jake.

Jake

The survivors of "The Ring" Rachel (Naomi Watts) and Aidan (David Dorfman) are living peaceful life in a new town. They survived by copying the video before the time limit was up. Rachel works in local newspaper with editor-in-chief Max Rourke (Simon Baker). The idyll is ruined as the video curse is spreading again.

Aidan and Rachel

Max Rourke

Samara (Kelly Stables) has found Aidan and Rachel again. She tries to possess Aidan to get back in the land of the living. Samara wants mommy to watch TV with. Soon it is time to escape murderous deer (?)

Killer deer

Rachel goes to search for answers and meets a real-estate agent Martin Savide (Gary Cole) Samara's real mother Evelyn (Sissy Spacek). She tells that there is a rather unpleasant solution to end the possession. How appropriate, if "Carrie" had a daughter, she would be like Samara.

Martin says hello

Evelyn

Hideo Nakata brings the element of water that looks like recycling ideas of "Dark Water." Water was also important in "Ringu 2" but it was more natural part of the story then as Sadako's birth and death were related to water. In Japanese (and also Western) myths water separates the land of the living and land of the dead. In "Dark Water" water was essential part of the mystery behind the haunting. Even in "The Ring" the water effects were more restrained. In "Ring 2" it feels like a gimmick to get keep the special effect crew employed.

Bridge symbolising the pathway between the land of the living and land of the dead

Shower should not work that way

The supporting actors are not used as interestingly as in the previous film. Gary Cole and Sissy Spacek just quickly pop in without much importance to the story. Also the new revelations about Samara's past do not bring much new to the Ring mythology. The messy script has unrelated horror clichés with plot holes big enough to drive a tank through. Some of the scenes have creepy atmosphere with good scares but as a whole the story does not work well as the mystery of the first film is gone.

Rating:

Average

Starring: Naomi Watts, Simon Baker, David Dorfman, Elizabeth Perkins, Gary Cole, Sissy Spacek, Ryan Merriman, Emily VanCamp, Kelly Overton, James Lesure, Daveigh Chase, Kelly Stables, Cooper Thornton, Marilyn McIntyre, Jesse Burch, Michael Chieffo, Steven Petrarca, Michael Dempsey, Kirk B.R. Woller, Jeffrey Hutchinson, Chane't Johnson, Mary Joy, Michelle Anne Johnson, Teri Bibb, Jill Farley, Aleksa Palladino, Victor McCay, Brendan Quinlan. Brendan Tomlinson, Phyllis Lyons, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Amy Haffner, Ted Detwiler, Stephen Holland , Omer Stephens III, Jonathan Coburn, Caitlin Mavromates, R. Michael David , Krystal Katz, Bill Kelley, Sherilyn Lawson, Betsy McIntyre, Adrienne Smith, Alan Winston

Director: Hideo Nakata

Dark Water (Honogurai mizu no soko kara)

Kadokawa Shoten Publishing Co., Nippon Television Network, Video Audio Project, Nikkatsu, Office Augusta Co. Ltd., Oz Company , Japan 2002.

Based on a collection of short stories by Koji Suzuki.

Yoshimi Matsubara (Hitomi Kuroki) has divorced and battles for custody of her daughter Ikuko (Rio Kanno). Yoshimi had some psychological problems before but she is better now. They move into a new apartment, an old run-down apartment house that has only some old people as tenants. It makes you think about the inverted age pyramid of Japan. There is water on the floor and surveillance camera shows a ghostly figure. Also the apartment has a lot of moisture. Warning! There may be a major water damage with mould (sounds like a typical school building in Finland).

Yoshimi Matsubara

Real-estate agent Ohta (Yu Tokui) introduces new home

Ikuko goes missing and is found playing on the roof terrace. After moving in everything seems fine, except for water dripping from the ceiling. Also the tap water is dirty. Apartment manager Kamiya (Isao Yatsu) is useless for the water problem. From the above apartment comes also child's footsteps but no one lives there.

Kamiya

Early water damage signs

Taking care of things and going to job interviews takes a lot of Yoshimi's time so Ikuko feels lonely. Yoshimi is late to take Ikuko home from pre-school so Ikuko's father (Fumiyo Kohinata) arrives to fetch her leading to conflict with Yoshimi. The stress begins to make Yoshimi nervous. Looking unbalanced would not look good for the custody case. Ikuko begins to see an imaginary friend. Then Yoshimi sees a poster of a little girl Mitsuko who went missing two years ago...

Ikuko's father

Ikuko and dark water

Much like the original "Ringu" the creepy atmosphere is built slowly. This is not surprising as also novel "Ringu" was written by Koji Suzuki. This time the story is built around lonely and neglected children. As in few years later made failed American version "Ring 2" water is essential part of the mystery as water symbolizes the element separating the land of the living and land of the dead. "Dark Water" is an effective ghost story that relies on the creepy atmosphere instead of cheap shocks.

It is not really a horror film but a psychological drama with a ghost mystery. Once again minimalistic music by Kenji Kawai and Shikao Suga is haunting and beautiful.

Rating:

Very Good

Starring: Hitomi Kuroki, Rio Kanno, Mirei Oguchi, Asami Mizukawa, Fumiyo Kohinata, Yu Tokui, Isao Yatsu, Shigemitsu Ogi, Maiko Asano, Yukiko Ikari, Shinji Nomura, Kiriko Shimizu, Teruko Hanahara, Youko Yasuda, Kono Tarou Suwa, Shichirou Gou, Chisako Hara, Tôru Shinagawa, Chihiro Ohtsuka, Tarô Suwa

Director: Hideo Nakata

Dark Water (2005)

Touchstone Pictures, Pandemonium Productions, Vertigo Entertainment, Post No Bills Films, USA, 2005.

(If the plot description sounds similar to my previous review of original Japanese "Dark Water" (2002), that's because the plots are basically the same.)

Dahlia Williams (Jennifer Connelly) has divorced and battles for custody of her daughter Ceci (Ariel Gade). Dahlia has some problems because she had a rough childhood with neglecting alcoholic mother. Dahlia and Ceci move into a new apartment in Roosevelt Island, an old Brutalist style apartment house. Estate agent Mr. Murray (John C. Reilly) shows the house that is in bad condition but the rents are cheap. Superintendent of the building is sloppy Mr. Veeck (Pete Postlethwaite). There is water on the floor and surveillance camera shows ghostly activity.

Ceci and Dahlia

Mr. Murray

Mr. Veeck

Ceci goes missing and is found playing on the roof terrace. After moving in everything seems fine, except for water dripping from the ceiling. Also the tap water is dirty. Creepy Mr. Veeck is useless for the water problem. Ceci's father Kyle (Dougray Scott) opposes Dahlia's choice of living location and wants to take the custody case into the court. Dahlia hires a "Lincoln lawyer" Jeff Platzer (Tim Roth) to help her.

Kyle

Jeff Platzer with his customer (muMs)

The stress begins to make Dahlia nervous. From the above apartment comes child's footsteps but no one lives here. Taking care of legal troubles and going to job takes a lot of Dahlia's time so Ceci feels lonely. Ceci begins to play with an imaginary friend Natasha. Oddly a girl named Natasha who once lived upstairs has vanished mysteriously.

Apartment complex, Brutalist style

What I said about the original Japanese version is mostly valid for the remake. It is not really a horror film but a psychological drama with a ghost mystery. Effective creepy atmosphere is enhanced by Angelo Badalamenti's melancholic score. Still it feels that overexplaining removes some of the emotional impact of the original. If you liked the original you might want to check this out also as this is a good remake.

Call the plumber

There are some artistic differences, the American version is more talky and the characters are more fleshed out. John C. Reilly's suave estate agent brings some slight comedy. Dahlia's mental breakdown is more pronounced here. Ghost girl Natasha (Perla Haney-Jardine) gets more screen time. The depressing concrete apartment complex is an interesting and eerie location. In this remake there seems to be other people living in the building, the house in original version seemed quite vacant.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Jennifer Connelly, John C. Reilly, Tim Roth, Dougray Scott, Pete Postlethwaite, Camryn Manheim, Ariel Gade, Perla Haney-Jardine, Debra Monk, Linda Emond, Bill Buell, J.R. Horne, Elina Löwensohn, Warren Belle, Alison Sealy-Smith, Simon Reynolds, Kate Hewlett, Jennifer Baxter, Diego Fuentes, Zoe Heath, Craig muMs Grant, Matthew Lemche, Edward Kennington, Jane Aronds, Ismael Peter Casillas III, Marshall Factora

Director: Walter Salles

Ju-on: The Curse (a.k.a Ju-on 1)

Toei Video Company, Japan, 2000.

Nota bene! This is the direct-to-video version of Ju-on made in 2000. The big budget film is "Ju-On: The Grudge" (2002) ¡eneb atoN

The naming of the films is the most confusing since "Zombi" movies.The order of the films is (the films I have are marked in bold, so that you know what reviews to expect for a week or so):

Katasumi and 4444444444 (Japan 1998, TV)

Ju-on: The Curse (Japan 2000, video)

Ju-on: The Curse 2 (Japan 2000, video)

Ju-on: The Grudge (Japan 2003)

Ju-on: The Grudge 2 (Japan 2003)

The Grudge (USA 2004 remake)

The Grudge 2 (USA 2006)

The Grudge 3 (USA 2009)

Ju-On: White Ghost (Japan 2009)

Ju-On: Black Ghost (Japan 2009)

Ju-On: The Beginning of the End (Japan 2014)

Ju-On: The Final Curse (Japan 2015)

When a person dies with a deep and powerful rage, a curse is born. When someone is killed because of the curse, a new curse is born. The curse can spread to new locations. So once it starts it becomes a never-ending spiral of death.

The movie is divided into six segments, each of them tells a story of one character. They are, in order: Toshio, Yuki, Mizuho, Kanna, Kayako, and Kyoko.

Toshio:
Teacher Shunsuke Kobayashi (Yûrei Yanagi, reporter from "Ringu" films) goes to see why boy named Toshio Saeki (Ryôta Koyama) has not come in school. Toshio is beaten badly and meows like a cat.

Shunsuke goes to visit Toshio

Something is very wrong

Yuki:

Some time later the house of Saeki-family has new owners, the Murakamis. Yuki (Hitomi Miwa) is studying with her friend Kanna Murakami (Asumi Miwa). When Yuki is alone she hears some scary sounds coming from the attic.

The house of the Saekis

Yuki hears scary sounds

Mizuho:

Mizuho Tamura (Chiaki Kuriyama) goes to school to find her missing boyfriend Kanna's brother Tsuyoshi (Kazushi Andô). Lights go out and Mizuho's phone rings.

Mizuho Tamura

Toshio's ghost

Kanna:

Detectives Yoshikawa (Denden) and Kamio (Tarô Suwa) are investigating murder of teen girl. Mother of the Murakami family, Noriko (Yumi Yoshiyuki) returns home and sees something horrible.

Detectives Yoshikawa and Kamio investigate ghastly murders

Kayako:

Back to Shunsuke. The visit reveals that Toshio's mother Kayako (Takako Fuji) was stalking Shunsuke. She was murdered by her jealous husband Takeo (Takashi Matsuyama).

Kyoko:

Some time later the house of Saeki is on sale again. Real estate agent Tatsuya (Makoto Ashikawa) asks his sensitive sister Kyoko to sense if there is presence of evil spirits.

Kyoko

On technical level this has quite crude cinematography as this is a low-budget video-level production. The story starts quite innocently, building slowly suspense and becoming more unnerving and shocking as the story goes on. Still the stories are very simple, and the movie is all about creating a frightening mood. There is very little of on screen gore, but the atmosphere and sound effects are bloodcurdling. The fragmented structure of the movie is very unusual and non-linear. The main story with Shunsuke is divided into two parts with some later events shown before returning to the mystery behind the hauntings. What is the most distinguishing feature compared to contemporary Asian horror movies is that Ju-on does not contain any social commentary unlike for example Hideo Nakata's horror films. Ju-on is just a bunch of intertwined horror stories where some regular people stumble upon a deadly curse and then are doomed to spread it further like plague. Although it is not perfect and sometimes confusing it is a good low-budget horror gem and a good example of what the best Japanese direct-to-video films were near the turn of the Millennium.

After this the next film to watch would be "Ju-On: The Curse 2" but as I do not have it I will watch "Ju-On: The Grudge" next.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Yûrei Yanagi, Yue, Ryôta Koyama, Hitomi Miwa, Asumi Miwa, Yumi Yoshiyuki, Kazushi Andô, Chiaki Kuriyama, Yoriko Dôguchi, Jun'ichi Kiuchi, Denden, Tarô Suwa, Reita Serizawa, Shirô Namiki, Takako Fuji, Takashi Matsuyama, Yûko Daike, Makoto Ashikawa, Kaori Fujii, Hua Rong Weng, Mayuko Saitô

Director: Takashi Shimizu

Ju-on: The Grudge (Ju-on: Gekijô-ban) a.k.a Ju-on a.k.a The Grudge

Pioneer LDC, Nikkatsu, Oz Company, Xanadeux, Japan, 2002.

Ju-on: The Grudge (Ju-on: Gekijô-ban) title

This is the continuation of "Ju-on: The Curse" and "Ju-on: The Curse 2." The house in the Nerima-district claims new victims. Likewise the prequels, this one is also divided into segments: Rika, Katsuya, Hitomi, Tôyama, Izumi and Kayako.

Rika:

Voluntary social worker Rika Nishina (Megumi Okina) goes to help old woman Sachie (Chikako Isomura) who can not take care of herself. Rika finds a weird boy Toshio (Yuya Ozeki) sitting in a closet.

Rika

The haunted house

Rika tries to help Sachie

Katsuya:

Earlier Sachie was living in the house with his son Katsuya Tokunaga (Kanji Tsuda) and his wife Kazumi (Shuri Matsuda). Kazumi finds a black cat in their house and falls into catatonic state. Katsuya's sister Hitomi (Misaki Itô) arrives to make some food but Katsuya acts weirdly.

Kazumi and Katsuya

Hitomi:

Hitomi returns to work. She is worried about Kazumi and Katsuya. She hears weird sounds and sees a ghost at her workplace. Also surveillance camera shows disturbing things. Terrified she flees to home. Maybe watching TV will calm her.

Hitomi

Watching TV does not help

Tôyama:

Rika's boss Hirohashi (Chikara Ishikura) comes to see what happened to Rika and Sachie. He finds Rika in shocked state. The police are called to investigate the house. Nakagawa Keiji (Hirokazu Inoue) leads the investigations. The house has a sinister history and lots of people have disappeared or died there. The disappearances began A former resident Takeo Saeki (Takashi Matsuyama) murdered her family there. Retired detective Yûji Tôyama (Yôji Tanaka) is called to consult the Saeki case.

Nakagawa Keiji

Yûji Tôyama and young Izumi

Ghosts of Kayako and Toshio

Izumi:

Several years later three school girls are missing. Tôyama's daughter Izumi (Misa Uehara) went with his friends to the haunted house but she ran away before the ghost appeared. Now she fears that she will die next.

Izumi

Eerie cats

Kayoko:

Sometime between the Tôyama and Izumi segments Rika has recovered from the shock but not fully. Her teacher friend Mariko (Kayoko Shibata) has a missing student whose home address is awfully familiar. Rika tries to warn Mariko before it is too late. However ghost of Kayako (Takako Fuji) is already waking up.

Mariko

The style is very similar to "Ju-on: The Curse." However I think that the first Ju-on was scarier because you did not yet know what to expect. Again the plot is very bareboned with strong focus on the nightmarish atmosphere. Several people meet their fate because of the vengeful Onryō spirits. The bigger budget allows some ghost special effects and better cinematography, although they do not stylistically differ much from the direct-to-video Ju-on. The look is still quite low-budget. Some "Ringu" style TV-screen scares are added. The timeline is non-linear with some foretelling visions. It does not change the formula much, but offers a steady parade of chilling moments.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Megumi Okina, Misaki Itô, Misa Uehara, Yui Ichikawa, Kanji Tsuda, Kayoko Shibata, Yukako Kukuri, Shuri Matsuda, Yôji Tanaka, Yoshiyuki Morishita, Hideo Sakaki, Takashi Matsuyama, Yuya Ozeki, Takako Fuji, Chikara Ishikura, Chikako Isomura, Chiona Ôkuni, Miho Fujima, Daisuke Honda, Hirokazu Inoue, Mao Kobayashi, Aki Fujî, Risa Odagiri, Kaori Nakajô, Kana Kobayashi, Akira Saito, Hiroyuki Yokoo, Isao Yatsu, Haruka Yamano

Director: Takashi Shimizu

Ju-on: The Grudge 2 (Ju-on 2: Gekijô-ban) a.k.a Ju-on 2 a.k.a The Grudge 2

Pioneer LDC, Nikkatsu, Oz Company, Xanadeux, Kadokawa Shoten Publishing Co.,Aozora Investments, Tokyo Theatres K.K., Japan, 2003.

Ju-on: The Grudge 2 Ju-on 2: Gekijô-ban title

Like the previous Ju-on films this one is also divided into six segments.

Horror actress Kyoko Harase (Noriko Sakai) and her fiancé Masashi Ishikura (Ayumu Saitô) drive over a cat. They see a glimpse of Toshio's ghost (Yuya Ozeki) they crash. Kyoko gets a miscarriage and Masashi falls into coma.

Kyoko Harase

Kyoko:

In hospital Kyoko sees Toshio again. Later she continues filming a movie but one of the extras senses something terrible about Kyoko. Kyoko finds out that she is still pregnant. Ghosts kill her mother Aki (Kaoru Mizuki).

Kyoko and Aki

Tomoka:

Before the car accident Tomoka Miura (Chiharu Niiyama) was hostess of TV show. Director Keisuke Ôkuni (Shingo Katsurayama), host Tomoka Miura, and hair stylist Megumi Obayashi (Emi Yamamoto) plan to make an episode of paranormal reality show with Kyoko in the infamous Saeki house. Tomoko's boyfriend Noritaka Yamashita (Kei Horie) gets an eerie phone call from Kayako's ghost (Takako Fuji).

Keisuke briefs the crew

Megumi and Tomoka

Megumi:

Film crew goes to film the show. Sound technician hears a weird sound. Megumi senses that Kyoko is pregnant and gives her a good luck charm. Toshio becomes interested in Kyoko. Megumi combs some wigs.

Filming the show

Megumi and the wigs

Keisuke:

After Kyoko's mother's death Masashi wakes up from coma but he is mute. Keisuke tells that everyone involved with the filming of the episode have died or disappeared. Kyoko acquires Kayako's diary. In the Saeki house Chiharu (Yui Ichikawa) who was seen briefly in the previous film is trying to escape the ghosts.

Chiharu

Chiharu:

Chiharu has nightmares about the haunted house. Her friend Hiromi (Erika Kuroishi) tells that a horror movie production is searching for extras. It was the same movie that was filmed in the Kyoko segment. Chiharu's spirit seems to be trapped in distorted time loop.

Filming the movie

Toshio

Kayako:

Keisuke sees Hiromi trying to save Chiharu from the house. Keisuke finds Kyoko fainted in the house and takes her to hospital. Kyoko's baby girl is born.

Structurally this is a bit different than the previous Ju-on films with more clearly intertwined events and characters. Shimizu seems to reference some American horror movies. There is a "Scream 3" style meta-level subplot about filming a Ju-on style horror movie. The pregnancy theme is like "Rosemary's Baby." The segment of Chiharu seems to be a homage to "Nightmare on Elm Street." Also the movie remembers its direct to video roots, as the TV-show recordings and Chiharu's segment use cheap video quality. This is scarier than the previous "Ju-on: The Grudge." Now the evil ghosts for the first time seem to have a plan. Still their motives are still in the dark, the ghosts being malevolent almost Lovecraftian spirits spreading death and chaos. There are slightly more special effects than in the previosu films, but they are not overblown and fit the creepy minimalistic style of the he film series. The ending is kind of nod to "The Omen." This film ended the first Ju-on film cycle, as the American versions are remakes (of sorts) and later Japanese movies are reboots of the story.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Noriko Sakai, Chiharu Niiyama, Kei Horie, Yui Ichikawa, Ayumu Saitô, Emi Yamamoto, Erika Kuroishi, Kaoru Mizuki, Shinobu Yûki, Takako Fuji, Yuya Ozeki, Shingo Katsurayama, Fumika Hidejima, Hidetoshi Kageyama, Hiroko Toda, Ziko Uchiyama, Hidekazu Mashima, Yukizumi Itô, Yasuhi Nakamura, Kenji Yamagami, Toshiaki Tanabe, Satoru Jitsunashi, Chika Nojima, Mio Kagawa, Naruki Matsukawa, Yuu Kamata, Sakura Kamata, Kôjun Itô

Director: Takashi Shimizu

The Grudge

Columbia Pictures, Ghost House Pictures, Fellah Pictures, Senator International, Vertigo Entertainment, USA, Japan, 2004.

This is an American remake/reboot of Takashi Shimizu's "Ju-on" series.

When someone dies in the grip of a powerful rage a curse is born.

In Tokyo teacher Peter (Bill Pullman) suddenly jumps down his balcony. Some years later Yoko (Yôko Maki) is treating Emma (Grace Zabriskie) who has dementia. Yoko hears rattling sound coming from the attic. It is Kayako (Takako Fuji) alright!

Peter

Social worker Karen (Sarah Michelle Gellar) and her boyfriend Doug (Jason Behr) have moved to Japan. Yoko is missing so Karen is sent to take care of Emma. Karen finds weird boy Toshio (Yuya Ozeki) and a cat sitting in a closet. Matthew (William Mapother) and Jennifer (Clea DuVall) who lived in the house with Emma have disappeared.

Karen and Doug

Saeki house

Toshio

Previously real estate agent Suzuki (Hajime Okayama) sold them the house and saw a ghost. Jennifer had hard time adjusting to life in Japan, but that became the least of her problems. Soon Toshio began to haunt Jennifer.

Jennifer

Karen's boss Alex (Ted Raimi) finds Emma dead and Karen in shocked state. Detectives Nagakawa (Ryo Ishibashi) and Igarashi (Hiroshi Matsunaga) investigate the case. They find the missing couple and a jawbone. Matthew's sister Susan (KaDee Strickland) is also missing. The next segment shows why.

Nagakawa, Igarashi and Alex

Susan

Karen begins to find out about who Toshio is and finds a news report about the Saeki murder case. Toshio and his mother Kayako (Takako Fuji) were murdered in the house by father Takeo (Takashi Matsuyama). Peter committed suicide soon after the murders so Karen goes to ask Peter's wife Maria (Rosa Blasi) if he knew Kayako. Next segment shows Peter's story.

Kayako

Again the film is divided into segments, each telling a part of the story. What is missing are the segment title cards. The real estate agent's name is Suzuki which is a reference to the first "Ju-on: The Curse." The originals were very minimalistic, the increased budget takes away some of the charm. Also the sound effect terror of the originals suffers from Hollywood-style horror music. It is not bad but redundant if you have seen the original Japanese versions as the plot is essentially same as in "Ju-on: The Grudge" and recycling the scary scenes of four Japanese movies. What is the greatest difference that this time the story centres around one main character (Karen) making the other segments less interesting. Produced by fan of the original "Ju-on", Sam Raimi.

Rating:

Average

Starring: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Jason Behr, William Mapother, Clea DuVall, KaDee Strickland, Grace Zabriskie, Bill Pullman, Rosa Blasi, Ted Raimi, Ryo Ishibashi, Yôko Maki, Yuya Ozeki, Takako Fuji, Takashi Matsuyama, Hiroshi Matsunaga, Hajime Okayama, Yoshiyuki Morishita, Kazuyuki Tsumura, Taigi Kobayashi, Junko Koizumi, Nana Koizumi, Yôichi Okamura, Eiji Ôki, Katsuhiro Oyama, Satoshi Ninomiya, Shinji Nomura

Director: Takashi Shimizu

The Grudge 2

Columbia Pictures Corporation, Ghost House Pictures, Mandate Pictures, Vertigo Entertainment, USA, Japan, 2006.

This version of Ju-on is divided into three intertwining subplots.

Some time after the events of the "The Grudge.":

Three high-school girls Allison (Arielle Kebbel), Vanessa (Teresa Palmer) and Miyuki (Misako Uno) visit the partially burned haunted Saeki house. Because if there is a house where everyone who enters it dies, you absolutely have to go there. That's a mistake.

Teresa Palmer, Arielle Kebbel and Misako Uno

Vanessa, Allison and Miyuki

Soon after the events of the "The Grudge.":

In California Aubrey (Amber Tamblyn) hears that her sister Karen (Sarah Michelle Gellar) is in hospital. She has survived the deadly curse until now. Aubrey must go to Japan to bring Karen back. Reporter Eason (Edison Chen) wants to interview Karen but she is restrained. She escapes when Kayako's ghost (Takako Fuji) begins to hunt her. As the fire changed something, the ghosts are now looking for new home.

Aubrey and her mother (Joanna Cassidy)

Karen

Eason and Aubrey try to find Kayako's mother (Kim Miyori) who is an exorcist. But once started nothing can stop the curse!

Eason

Terrible photos

Some time and couple of days after the events of the "The Grudge.":

In Chicago Trish (Jennifer Beals), Bill (Christopher Cousins) and Bill's kids Jake (Matthew Knight) and Lacey (Sarah Roemer) move to new apartment. A weird hooded person lives next door. The curse has come to USA...

Trish and Bill

Jake

"The Grudge 2" changes the already too familiar formula but not to the right direction. This iteration of Grudge is more and more resembling an generic American boogeyman style horror movie. The segmented nonlinear structure still sort of exists making the story jump around in time, but in lesser amount than in previous Shimizu's movies as there are only three subplots. The action is taken from the haunted house to hospital, high-school (with an obligatory girls' locker room scene), love motel, countryside and finally to USA. There is an really weird explanation for the origin of the curse. Basically the plot is slightly more interesting than in the previous "The Grudge" remake, with adequately sinister atmosphere but nowhere as effective as the original Ju-on films.

Rating:

Average

Starring: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Amber Tamblyn, Arielle Kebbel, Takako Fuji, Edison Chen, Sarah Roemer, Matthew Knight, Misako Uno, Teresa Palmer, Ohga Tanaka, Yuya Ozeki, Jennifer Beals, Christopher Cousins, Zen Kajihara, Takashi Matsuyama, Joanna Cassidy, Eve Gordon, Jenna Dewan Tatum, Ryo Ishibashi, Shaun Sipos, Kim Miyori, Sotaro Nagasawa, Kyoka Takizawa, Paul Jarrett, Gwenda Lorenzetti, Satoshi Ninomiya, Mitsuo Togioka, Masanobu Yada, Nahana, Isao Yatsu, Akira Sato, Tomomi Hiraiwa, Yôko Chôsokabe, Kayoko Toda, Shuri Matsuda, Yuzo Mikawa

Director: Takashi Shimizu

The Grudge 3

Stage 6 Films, Ghost House Pictures, Ozla Pictures, Sony Pictures Entertainment, Unified Film Organization (UFO), Vertigo Entertainment, USA, Japan, 2009.

The curse has moved to Chicago. Jake (Matthew Knight) survived "The Grudge 2", but witnessed the deaths of his family members and is now in mental hospital. Kayako kills him in a locked room. Dr. Sullivan (Shawnee Smith) is puzzled.

Jake

Dr. Sullivan

In Chicago Lisa's (Johanna Braddy) little sister Rose (Jadie Rose Hobson) begins to see ghost Toshio (Shimba Tsuchiya). Lisa is moving to New York with her boyfriend Andy (Beau Mirchoff). Their brother Max (Gil McKinney) is the manager of the building. Rose has bad asthma and Max wants to send Rose away to a healthier location. In Japan Naoko (Emi Ikehata) finds out about Jake's death and travels to Chicago.

Lisa and Andy

Max

Rose

Tenants of the haunted house Renee (Laura Giosh) and her traumatized daughter Brenda (Mihaela Nankova) move away from the house. Brenda has barely entered new home when the ghosts take her (now that was the most pointless death in the Grudge series, wasn't it?) Also various other characters are killed by the ghosts. Naoko wants to exorcise the house.

Brenda

Naoko

Kayako

Shock reveal! Naoko is Kayako's sister who was never referenced even in "The Grudge 2." (In next part do we get to see Kayako's uncle or cousin? Or Saeki-family's meter reader?)

Takashi Shimizu was no longer directing this and worked only as producer. And it is understandable as making six Ju-on & Grudge films must have been quite repetitive and numbing experience. Also Kayako's and Toshio's actors changed. The third movie tries to milk the last drops from an already dried cow. Not much is left of the original creepy atmosphere. As the series descended to direct-to-video limbo, the budget is lower than in the two previous movies. Shimizu could have pulled that to his advantage but Toby Wilkins couldn't. The story is completely linear with regular teen-horror tropes and uninspired dialogue. The subtle horror of the original is changed to cheap slasher horror. Even Kayako's rattling sound somehow sounds worse.

Co-produced by Phillip J. Roth and filmed in Bulgaria.

Rating:

Bad

Starring: Matthew Knight, Shawnee Smith, Mike Straub, Aiko Horiuchi, Shimba Tsuchiya, Emi Ikehata, Takatsuna Mukai, Johanna Braddy, Beau Mirchoff, Jadie Rose Hobson, Marina Sirtis, Gil McKinney, Laura Giosh, Mihaela Nankova, Michael McCoy

Director: Toby Wilkins

Some recent additions to the Shameless Pile include both DVDs and literature.
Here are some books that either have been made into movies or are film novelizations and the corresponding movies:

Dick-King Smith: The Water Horse (Finnish edition: Vesihevonen)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0760329/

Emma McLaughlin: Nanny Diaries (Nanny- lastenhoitajan päiväkirja))
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0489237/

Dan Gordon: Wyatt Earp (film novelization):
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111756/

Chris Kyle: American Sniper
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2179136/

Beatrix Potter: Tales of Beatrix Potter (Petteri Kaniinin satumaailma)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0067570/

Janet Fitch: White Oleander (Valkoinen oleanteri)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0283139/

Robert Bloch: Psycho I-II
Psycho Collection:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0155975/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086154/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091799/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102724/

I have these also on DVD (somewhere) except Sabrina:

John Steakley: Vampire$ (Vampyyrin metsästäjät)
John Carpenter's Vampires: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120877/

Deborah Chiel: Sabrina (film novelization, originally based on Samuel A. Taylor 's play)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0114319/

Craig Shaw Gardner: Batman (film novelization)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096895/

Grudge Match

Callahan Filmworks, Gerber Pictures, RatPac-Dune Entertainment, Warner Bros, USA, 2013.

Boxing champs Henry 'Razor' Sharp (Sylvester Stallone) and Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen (Robert De Niro) are the fiercest rivals. After two matches in the 1980s the third and final grudge match was cancelled because Razor retired. Benevolent Razor went broke because of trusting to wrong people and returned to work in shipyard. Loudmouth Kid owns bar and car businesses.

Razor and The Kid

Promoter Dante Slate, Jr. (Kevin Hart) tells that a video game company wants to model Razor and The Kid into their game. Razor does not want to but he agrees so that he can pay his coach's Louis 'Lightning' Conlon's (Alan Arkin) nursing home bills.

Dante Slate, Jr

Louis 'Lightning' Conlon

Grudgement Day promotion

The two rivals meet at the studio. The fight of Razor and The Kid becomes a viral hit in social media. After 30 years the old boxers agree to have rematch on Grudgement Day! Both guys are old and in bad shape so extensive training is needed. Also both men have to participate promotion campaign making silly commercials. Razor's old love Sally (Kim Basinger) showss up to complicate the things further. Also The Kid meets his son BJ (Jon Bernthal).

Sally

And so it is that Rocky Balboa and Jake LaMotta have gotten old. Still they decide to show the Selfie Generation that they are still alive. At the same time both men have to deal with the problems of the past and fix their lives. In the final match both veteran boxers have their moments.

The movie stays quite light with comedic dialogue and carefree taunting but there is also some light drama. The actors seem to be having fun, although many jokes are hit-or-miss. The style is lightly nostalgic and bit like 1980s feel-good comedies. Some affectionate parody is based on Sly's and Robert's tough guy images and their boxing films. Stallone trains using Rocky-style methods pulling trucks and throwing tractor tyres, while De Niro trains in the gym and has to prove his worth to humiliate the scorning gym-owner Frankie Brite (LL Cool J). There is a good cast of supporting characters with Alan Arkin, Kevin Hart and Kim Basinger. It is not a serious film but it is fun entertainment.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Jim Lampley, Sylvester Stallone, Robert De Niro, Rich Little, Ireland Baldwin, Anthony Bean, Mason Mackie, Kevin Hart, Barry Primus, Oscar Gale, Frederick Douglas Plunkett Jr., BJ Guyer, Jen Kober, Anthony Anderson, Carrie Lazar, Don Lake, Han Soto, Kurt Krause, Steve Levy, John Buccigross, Alan Arkin, Kenneth Kynt Bryan, Greg Sproles, Matthew Rimmer, Kirk W. Johnson, Yohance Myles, Larry Morgan, Jai Stefan, Frank Pesc, Kim Basinger, Todd Truley, Paul Ben-Victor, Robert Larriviere, Jon Bernthal, Joey Diaz, LL Cool J, Greg Plitt, Courtney Brennan, Mykel Shannon Jenkins, Rowan Joseph, Macsen Lintz, Dane Rhodes, Mike Goldberg, Camden Gray, Kate Reinders, Griff Furst, Sam Hoger, Chael Sonnen, Judd Lormand, Camila Le Sage, Bonnie Hellman, Wyatt Harris, Larry Merchant, Roy Jones Jr., Robert Sale, James Joseph, Michael Buffer, Pat Russell, Mike Tyson, Evander Holyfield
Director: Peter Segal

100 Degrees Below Zero a.k.a 100° Below Zero a.k.a Frozen apocalypse a.k.a Silent World 2013

The Asylum, The Institution, Next Station Productions, USA, Hungary, 2013.

In Iceland huge volcano erupts. Pilot Steve Foster (Jeff Fahey) has married a young wife Lacey (Judit Fekete). They have to land in London but Steve's teen kids Taryn (Sara Malakul Lane, known for Sharktopus) and Ryan (Marc Ewins) are stuck in Paris.

Lacey and Steve

Ryan and Taryn

The eruption causes a chain reaction of other volcano eruptions in Europe. Dr. Goldschein (Iván Kamarás) predicts that the huge ash clouds will block the Sun and cause a new ice age. British Colonel Ralph Dillard (John Rhys-Davies) starts to prepare for evacuation of the key personnel in Europe.

Dr. Goldschein

Colonel Ralph Dillard

Steve and Lacey try to reach Paris and find Taryn and Ryan. Taryn and Ryan try to survive cold, hail, earthquakes and robbers. And it is a wonder they manage to survive. Except for some action scenes where Taryn shows that she can kick their survival skills are absolutely stunning. If you think about Bear Grylls, they are exactly the opposite. Damn it! There aren't any warm coats in whole Paris!

There aren't any warm coats in whole Paris!

An example of their orienteering skills:

Ryan: Hey, look we don't not know where we are going!

Taryn: I think we are supposed to stand on the doorway.

This is absolutely hilarious trash.

Kudos still for strong female characters as Taryn is less useless than Ryan. Also Lacey seems to be more concerned about her stepchildren than their father.

The Asylum has found some pretty Hungarian actresses for the minor roles.

Ana (Fru Roszil)

Angelique (Zsofi Trecsko)

Don't know if this was meant to be a mockbuster trying to piggyback on the early hype of other ice-age film "Snowpiercer" that was released later in the same year. At least it borrows heavily from "Day After Tomorrow." And hey, the music sounds eerily similar to Doctor Who - 11th Doctor theme (I am the Doctor)!

The film's pacing and continuity are odd. After the first volcanic eruption the Steve and Lacey are flying and trying to land in England. When the other volcanoes erupt they are still in the air. While Taryn and Ryan wander around Paris trying to find warm clothes, the rest of the Europe has already buried under snow. Dialogue is laughable. The acting is not all terrible as the actors try to do their best in the limits of the terrible script. It has to be said that it never feels dull with dangerous situations popping up every minute.

Hey, I just spotted a Nato MI-8 helicopter with Russian Star markings!

MI-8 helicopter

John Rhys-Davies hams it up by looking super-concerned every time someone speaks to him. As usually with Syfy or Asylum disaster films the big cities seem to be populated by about ten people. The poster shows a frozen girl, no such scene is in the movie. This is a hilariously bad movie, great fun for The Asylum fans.

Rating:

So bad it is good

Starring: Jeff Fahey, Sara Malakul Lane, Marc Ewins, John Rhys-Davies, Iván Kamarás, Luke Healy, Judit Fekete, Zsófi Trecskó, Fru Roszil, Peter Linka, András Korcsmáros, Tamás Deák, Declan Hannigan, Tamás Lengyel, Zoltan Erdelyi, Csaba Gerner, Lajos Kalmár, Steve Carlson, Gabor F. Gabriel, Maximilian Elfeldt, Andray Johnson, Jordan James Smith, Richard Schenkman, Ross John Gilbert, Jane Doole

Director: R.D. Braunstein

Jurassic Shark a.k.a Attack of the Jurassic Shark

TomCat Films, Brett Kelly Entertainment, Dudez Productions, Canada, 2012.

Hey, it is on IMDB's Bottom 100 Lowest Rated Movies list so it must be good!

Dr. Lincoln Grant (Jurgen Vollrath) gets permission from Chairman (Jody Haucke) to start drilling through a pocket of ice under a lake. Oil drillers drill too deep and wake up an extinct Megalodon shark (that is actually not from Jurassic era). This happens offscreen as showing drilling platform punching through ice would be too expensive. Two bikini girls Tiffany (Sarah Mosher) & Brittany (Kala Gray) talk drivel and go to swim playfully splashing water. Shark eats them soon. No worries, new bikini girls will enter soon.

Chairman and Dr. Grant

Tiffany & Brittany

Some criminals and their boss Barb (Angela Parent) arrive at the lake area. They have stolen a painting and plan to escape in a rowboat. Shark has other plans and the painting falls overboard. The always hungry fish eats one of the bandits.

Angela Parent, Duncan Milloy and Phil Dukarsky

Barb, Rich and Doug

Also Jill (Emanuelle Carriere) and her friends have decided to visit the lake. Jill wants to reveal the illegal oil drilling operation. Surprise! All of them are dressed in bikinis, except Mike (Kyle Martellacci). When the shark eats people from the both parties, they team up temporarily. So it is Bandit Team Barb, Rich (Duncan Milloy), Doug (Phil Dukarsky) vs. Bikini Team Jill, Tia (Christine Emes) and Kristen (Celine Filion). Then they happily wander in the forest. Soon the bandits take everyone hostages. Rich suddenly goes crazy and thinks that they should sacrifice the girls to the shark god, dead or alive.

Mike and Jill

Kristen and Tia

Eaten by a terrible green screen effect

Dismal continuity - check!

Cardboard characters - check!

Overblown epic score - check!
Ultra-generic "plot" - check!

Terrible pacing (just wait until you see the stroll in the forest scene) - check!
Under or overexposed lighting - check!

Awkward use of slow motion - check!
Shark that is too big to live in the small lake but can stealthy prey its victims in knee-deep water - check!
(Bonus: It can even fly!)

Crunchy crispbread eating sound every time shark eats someone - check!

Silly sequel-baiting end - check!

12 minute end credits with beer ads - check!

This is completely amateur stuff with zero budget. Shark stock footage is combined with terrible CGI-effects. Even the shark has nothing to suggest that it is Jurassic, it is just a big shark. Also the sound recording is of variable quality. The acting is bad without much putting soul into the roles. Girls, the shark just ate your friend, at least try to look sad for more than five seconds!

I think this was just an excuse to film some girls in bikinis. Right, dudes?

Cool!

It is not so bad that it is good, just bad. Still the director Brett Kelly has potential to become Canada's Ed Wood. Recommendable only for the most hardened trash movie connoisseurs. Check the trailer for highlights.

Rating:

Very bad

Starring: Emanuelle Carriere, Christine Emes, Celine Filion, Angela Parent, Duncan Milloy, Phil Dukarsky, Kyle Martellacci , Joshua Gilbert Crosby, Kevin Preece, Jurgen Vollrath, Sarah Mosher, Kala Gray, Sherry Thurig, Jody Haucke, Darren Stevens, Ian Quick, Kimberly Wolfe

Director: Brett Kelly

Cilo from the blog Cinema Lozenge (in Finnish only) asked fellow bloggers to answer the legendary The Ten Questions of Bernard Pivot, that James Lipton from "Inside the Actors Studio" poses to the actors he interviews. / Cinema Lozengen Cilo pyysi muita bloggaajia vastailemaan Bernard Pivot'n legendaarisen kymmenen kysymyksen sarjaan, joita "Tähdet kertovat" ohjelman James Lipton näyttelijävierailtaan kyselee.

What is your favourite word / Mikä on suosikkisanasi?

Piggy / Possu

What is your least favorite word? / Mistä sanasta pidät vähiten?

Bureaucracy / Byrokratia

What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? / Mikä saa sinut innostumaan?

The feeling of success and positive people / Onnistumisen tunne ja positiiviset ihmiset

What turns you off? / Mikä saa sinut lannistumaan?

Exercise in futility & frustration ‎/ Turhauttava ja hyödytön puuhastelu

What is your favorite curse word? / Mikä on suosikki kirosanasi?

S*tan! / P**kele!

What sound or noise do you love? / Mitä ääntä rakastat?

Sound of a coffeemaker / Kahvinkeittimen ääni

What sound or noise do you hate? / Mitä ääntä inhoat?

Sound of a hard drive dying / Hajoavan kiintolevyn ääni

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? / Mitä muuta ammattia haluaisit kokeilla?

Photographer or something to do with the film industry / Valokuvaaja tai jokin elokuva-alan työ

What profession would you not like to do? / Mitä ammattia et haluaisi kokeilla?

Telemarketer / Puhelinmyyjä

(Been there, done that, got the feckin' T-shirt!)

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? / Jos Jumala on olemassa, mitä haluaisit hänen sanovan sinulle taivaanporteilla?

Nice. Enough practice, how about the real thing now? / Hyvin harjoiteltu. Nyt sitten päästään asiaan.

Pompeii

TriStar Pictures, FilmDistrict, Constantin Film International, Impact Pictures Pompeii, Don Carmody Productions, Canada, Germany, USA, 2014.

In Northern Britannia 62 A.D. Celtic tribes are rebelling. Roman legionnaires led by Tribune Corvus (Kiefer Sutherland, from "24") and officer Proculus (Sasha Roiz, from "Grimm") kill young Milo's (Dylan Schombing) family. Milo is sold as slave and he is sent to gladiator training.

Milo

Proculus and Corvus

In 79 A.D. Milo (Kit Harington, from "Game of Thrones") is a popular fighter and he is sent to Pompeii. On the way there he makes an impression to Roman noblewoman Cassia (Emily Browning). In Pompeii Milo becomes the eyesore of fellow gladiators. However he gains some respect from champion Atticus (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje from "Oz") who has only one fight left to win his freedom.

Cassia and Ariadne (Jessica Lucas)

Atticus

Corvus who is now Senator arrives to Pompeii. Cassia's father (Jared Harris) plans to get his funding to improve the infrastructure of the city. Naughty Corvus plans to marry Cassia. In the arena Milo and Atticus must fight for their lives. As Cassia is in love with Milo, Corvus makes Milo to fight against impossible odds.

Milo and Atticus must fight for their lives

The choir

When Vesuvius erupts all the best-laid plans of mice and men go awry as the pyroclastic flow does not care who is good or evil. As the disaster movie formula goes the first half is about introducing the characters and their motives and the second half is all about the disaster.

Pompeii before...

...and after.

I wonder how much of the movie were leftovers from the project that was cancelled in 2007. Roman Polanski was supposed to direct film adaptation of Robert Harris' novel "Pompeii." In April 2011 Ridley Scott was producing mini-series and first news about Paul W.S. Anderson's film version were announced May 2011. It smells like the fate of Jodorowsky's "Dune" here.

Although the plots are different (in the book Roman engineer comes to take care of aqueduct, exposes corruption of a Roman land speculator and tries to escape with the daughter of the mentioned land speculator) there are couple of similarities. In the book engineer named Marcus Attilius Primus had a scornful boss named Corax (combined with movie's Corvus that means raven). In the book land speculator's daughter is unwillingly engaged to one of the city's magistrates and the hero must save her from the villa before it is destroyed.

The movie is a mix of peplum adventure and disaster film, kind of "Gladiator" and "Titanic" combined. Although the story is basically of a Hollywood popcorn flick, it still has guts to avoid syrupy happy Hollywood ending. The depiction of the architecture of Pompeii (although not necessary of Roman society) and the volcanic eruption have been praised for accuracy (except for lava bombs and tidal waves). As a disaster film it is spectacular, just don't expect any groundbreaking or original plot.

The characters are quite typical, but interesting enough to care about their fates. Still much was left on the cutting room floor, some DVD/Blu-ray releases contain over 20 minutes of deleted scenes which are missing from the bareboned Scandinavian DVD. Kiefer Sutherland is the sneeringly evil villain and Kit Harington and Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje the brave heroes. Carrie-Anne Moss has a small role as Cassia's mother.

Rating:

Good

Starring: Kit Harington, Carrie-Anne Moss, Emily Browning, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Jessica Lucas, Jared Harris, Joe Pingue, Kiefer Sutherland, Currie Graham, Dylan Schombing, Maxime Savaria, Ron Kennell, Tom Bishop Sr., Rebecca Eady, Sasha Roiz, Jean-Francois Lachapelle, Jean Frenette, Dalmar Abuzeid, Emmanuel Kabongo, Brock Johnson, Kristina Nicoll, Janine Theriault, Mark Whelan, Anaïs Frenette, Donna Christo, Thomas Stumpo

Director: Paul W.S. Anderson

Skeleton Man a.k.a Skeletonman

Martini Films, Nu Image Films, Two Sticks Productions, USA, Bulgaria, 2004.

Archaeologists Charles and Marissa find the skull of Indian chief Six Bears. Hooded Skeleton Man (unrecognisable Paul Sampson) kills them with axe and sword. He takes the skull. Soldiers are sent to stop Skeleton Man but they all die. Undercover search and rescue team with Captain Leary (Michael Rooker) is sent to rescue the search and rescue team that went to save the soldiers (bit like "Hot Shots 2"). The other notable members of the team are Staff Sgt. Oberron (Casper Van Dien) and Lt. Scott (Sarah Ann Schultz). It's no use trying to remember the other names as Skelly kills them soon.

Lt. Scott and Capt. Leary

Staff Sgt. Oberron

Skeleton Man is like Predator, with heat vision (that effect looks useless during daytime, like a 3D-movie without the red/green glasses) and teleporting skills. Every time he punches someone, the victim flies at least 10 feet. He has also magical ability to switch weapons on the fly between spear, club and sword and a modern axe he seems to have purchased from hardware store together with his vinyl raincoat. He also has bow he uses to shoot down helicopters. Also his horse can change colour! Or then it is bad editing and everything.

Skeleton Man with his brown horse

The rescue team meets an old blond Indian (Robert Miano) who likes beans. He says that Old Joe is trying to prove himself by scalping warriors. While he was alive he killed his tribe. The skull from the beginning is never mentioned again. Skelly's real name is Cotton Mouth Joe. Indian's story does not help much, Cotton Mouth Joe is just some guy who kills people.

Old Indian

Skelly continues killing soldiers, huntsmen and a fisherman. Only Leary and Lt. Scott survive. Finally Skelly goes to kill the employers of chemical factory. Leary blows up the factory and Skelly dies (or does he?) Movie ends.

Skeleton Man

Ha! IMDB Trivia says:
In Germany the movie is tagged as a comedy-film and not as a horror-film. The advertising slogan on the DVD-Package announces "Here lives the spirit of Ed Wood".

It is a fitting description as the film is clumsy and badly done with laughable production values. It looks like the scriptwriter, prop department and whoever was responsible for continuity just gave up.

The dialogue tries to be macho with lines like "This reminds me of when we were in Laos" but is is just pointless as the soldiers are the worst special force team ever. Michael Rooker has a Vietnam flashback that is from some other film. The cinematography is ugly with jerky camera movements and continuity errors are everywhere. The monster himself looks like a man with cheap Halloween mask and cheap plastic raincoat or alternatively ragged cloak (it changes). Cheap gore effects make the incredibly stupid kills look even more stupid. Everything explodes, even trees. The scars on soldiers' faces change sides and sometimes vanish completely, the same goes also with Michael Rooker's arm wound.

Fun fact: Paul Sampson performs the uncredited role of Skeleton Man but he performs also the role of hunter named Nathan, who is killed by Skeleton Man.

Johnny Martin is a talented stunt man but oh man his directing skills...

Rating: (Depending on the mood)

Very bad or

So bad it is good

Starring: Jackie Debatin, Eric Etebari, Jonathon Klein, Robert Miano, Timothy V. Murphy, Maurice Nehru, Lisa Oliva Rodriguez, David E. Ornston, Carlos Rodriguez, Michael Rooker, Bill M. Ryusaki, Paul Sampson, Sarah Ann Schultz, Booboo Stewart, Maegan Stewart, Nils Allen Stewart, Renee Steward, Noa Tishby, Joey Travolta, Jerry Trimble Jr., Dominiquie Vandenberg, Casper Van Dien, Natalie Alexander, Carlos Buti, Philip Hersh, Paul Dion Monte, Andrew Stubblefield, Ernesto Trinidad, Mike Wike

Director: Johnny Martin

Atanarjuat the Fast Runner

Aboriginal Peoples Television Network, Canada Television and Cable Production Fund License Program, Canadian Film or Video Production Tax Credit, Canadian Government, Canadian Television, Channel 24 Igloolik, Igloolik Isuma Productions Inc., National Film Board of Canada, Telefilms Equity Investment Program, Vision Television, Canada, 2001.

Based on thousand year old Inuit legend that was passed down through oral tradition.

(The beginning is quite murky, so I had to check the beginning of the plot from Wikipedia)

Good shaman Qulitalik (Pauloosie Qulitalik) leaves. He promises his sister Panikpak (Madeline Ivalu) that he will return some day is she needs help. Panikpak is also camp leader Kumaglak's (Apayata Kotierk) wife. Then something evil happens. Mysterious evil shaman Tungajuaq (Abraham Ulayuruluk) has arrived in the camp. Kumaglak dies in a spiritual duel with the shaman and leader's necklace is given to his son Sauri (Eric Nutarariaq). Sauri killed his father with shaman. Young Tulimaq (Stephen Qrunnut) openly accuses Sauri.

Qulitalik is leaving

Some years later Tulimaq (Felix Alaralak) has become the laughing stock of the tribe. His hunting luck is bad because of the shaman's curse. He has trouble feeding his two sons Amaqjuaq and Atanarjuat and wife Pittaluk (Pipily Akkitirq). Panikpak secretly helps the family by bringing food to Tulimaq's sons.

When Amaqjuaq (Pakak Innuksuk) and Atanarjuat (Natar Ungalaaq) have grown up, they are bullied by Sauri's son Oki (Peter-Henry Arnatsiaq) and his gang. Amaqjuaq is strong and Atanarjuat runs fast so they can beat the bullies. Oki is betrothed to Atuat (Sylvia Ivalu), but she likes Atanarjuat instead. Also Oki's sister Puja (Lucy Tulugarjuk) likes Atanarjuat and uses every change to try to seduce him.

Amaqjuaq

Atanarjuat

Oki

Oki and Atanarjuat duel for the right to marry Atuat. Both take turns to punch opponent in the head and he who is knocked out loses. Atanarjuat sees vision of Qulitalik and wins. Atanarjuat and Atuat are married. Their happiness is short-lived as Atarnarjuat is sent to hunt Caribou. On his way he stops at Sauri's camp. Puja is sent to help Atarnarjuat. What do you know, soon Atarnarjuat has two wives.

Atuat

Puja

Marrying Puja breaks the harmony of Atanarjuat's and Amaqjuaq's families. Puja's actions cause Oki to attempt murdering Atanarjuat. However they kill Amaqjuaq and Atanarjuat has to flee running naked through the icy landscape. Qulitalik's family hides him. Then Atanarjuat plans for revenge! He must punish the evildoers, save Atuat and banish the evil spirit.

Atanarjuat has to flee

This was the first Inuktitut-language feature film with real Inuit actors. This gives it authentic and naturalistic look with some mysticism, as was also the case with New Zealand made "The Silent One" that was set in the Pacific Islands. At the same time "Atanarjuat" is a description of Inuit way of life and a epic folk tale. Living in the harsh environment requires co-operation and the conflicts are resolved in a ritualistic way. When the conflicts have been resolved life returns to normal. Watching it requires patience as the story moves on with very slow pace and the minimalistic style is unconventional compared to main stream movies. Still the story has universal themes of love, jealousy, greed, betrayal and power struggles. The movie has documentary feel with Inuit traditions and culture, igloo building and Inuit throat singing. It is like watching the human prehistory. As the Inuits are on Paleo diet it will never be popular film for vegans!

There are also the familiar snow goggles that can sometimes be spotted previously in popular culture:

Oki wearing snow goggles

Visually the film looks beautiful with "Dersu Uzala" style shots of glaciers and tundra. As a cultural depiction it is an important film. On the negative side the beginning is quite confusing, and it is hard to identify the characters who wear similar clothes. Also the movie could have benefited from some condensing as it is now almost three hours.

Rating:

Very good

Starring: Natar Ungalaaq, Sylvia Ivalu, Peter-Henry Arnatsiaq, Lucy Tulugarjuk, Madeline Ivalu, Pauloosie Qulitalik, Eugene Ipkarnak, Pakak Innuksuk, Neeve Irngaut, Abraham Ulayuruluk, Apayata Kotierk, Mary Qulitalik, Luke Taqqaugaq, Alex Uttak, Eric Nutarariaq, Stephen Qrunnut, Pipily Akkitirq, Mary Angutautuk, Charlie Qulitalik, Atuat Akkitiq, Catherine Alaralak, Susan Kublu, Samueli Ammaq, Micheline Ammaq, Lucien Ukkalianuk, Therese Ukkalianuk, Felix Alaralak, Elizabeth Nutarakittuq, Jenny Irngaut, Rita Ijjiraq, Andrew Uyarasuk, Cindy Paniaq, Lou Paula Kunuk, Maggie Ukkalianuk, Arsene Ivalu, Racheal Uyarasuk, Catherine Arnatsiaq, Reena Qulitalik, Bernice Ivalu, Mark Alaralak, Isa Akkitirq, Laurent Arnatsiaq, Isa Ammaq, Cora Akkitirq, Steven Akkitirq, Wilma Ammaq, Daniel Akkitirq, Hayley-June Ammaq, Colleen Ulayuruluk, Andrew Micheli

Director: Zacharias Kunuk

The Other Guys

Columbia Pictures, Gary Sanchez Productions, Mosaic, Wintergreen Productions, USA, 2010.

Danson (Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson) and Highsmith (Samuel L. Jackson) are two tough New York City cops. They blow up half town to bust some petty criminals and the public loves them. However they are not the main characters of the film.

Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne 'Rock' Johnson

Highsmith and Danson

Awesome to the max.

Nerdy Allen Gamble (Will Ferrell) and pugnacious Terry Hoitz (Mark Wahlberg) are two frustrated office workers. When Danson and Highsmith die in a way worthy of Darwin Awards, new heroes are needed. Terry wants to be a hero and he forces Allen to attend field police work. Captain Gene (Michael Keaton) is not impressed about the two goofsters going after the big fish. Even less impressed are their colleagues Martin (Rob Riggle) and Fosse (Damon Wayans Jr.).

Terry Hoitz and Allen Gamble

Captain Gene

Trivial permit violation case puts them on the track of corporate crime. Investing banker David Ershon (Steve Coogan) is kidnapped by mercenary Roger Wesley (Ray Stevenson) who claims to be his bodyguard. Ershon has just lost lots of money with bad investments so he needs to cover the losses somehow. The mismatched pair decides to solve the case.

David Ershon

This is fun buddy cop film with over the top action scenes with wacky dialogue and weird characters. It works well as parody of the genre, mopping the floor with cheap modern spoofs. The pair keeps switching the roles between the loony guy and the straight man. Although the crime story is basic cop movie stuff, the characters are pleasantly unpredictable. Amusingly the mousy Allen is the irresistible ladies' man. Eva Mendes appears as Allen's "cute but not hot" wife Sheila. Will Ferrell's character's past is full of surprises. Also Mark Walhberg's character has learned some artistic skills just to annoy his opponents. Some scenes seem to be improvised with deadpan characters telling surrealistically absurd stories. The soundtrack is hilariously offbeat with 70s-80s soft rock in the chase scenes. The chemistry of Ferrell and Wahlberg works well. As the story is focused on business crime, the end credits offer some infographics about costs of Madoff's Ponzi scheme and bank bailouts.

Sheila

Hard night at the bar

Rating:

Good

Starring: Will Ferrell, Mark Wahlberg, Eva Mendes, Michael Keaton, Larnell Stovall, Jalil Jay Lynch, Roy T. Anderson, Ray Stevenson, Samuel L. Jackson, Andrew Secunda, Sara Chase, Dwayne Johnson, David Gideon, Joshua Church, Rob Riggle, Damon Wayans Jr., Michael Delaney, Alison Becker, Steve Coogan, Warren Kelley, Bobby Cannavale, Zoe Lister-Jones, Sean Heilig, Matthew J. McCarthy, Adam Phillips, Tess Kartel, Rob Mars, C.C. Taylor, Zach Woods, Jake Quinn, Andy Buckley, Elizabeth Kaledin, Will Lyman, Rob Huebel, Peter R. Thewes, Robin Ng, Natalie Zea, Brett Gelman, Malachy McCourt, Barry Carl, Benjamin Magnuson, Thomas McDonnell, James O'Donnell, Kevin Osborne, Pierce Turner, James Archie Worley, Lindsay Sloane, Shakiem Evans, Danielle Cell, Brianne Moncrief, Patrick Ferrell, Adam McKay, Oliver Wood, James Mazzola, Patrick Crowley, Ben Schwartz, Tara Copeland, Eamon Speer, Patrick Reale, Zak Orth, Pete Antico, Viola Harris, Jamie Dugal, Chris Gethard, Michael Fawcett, Pilar Angelique

with cameos by Anne Heche, Ice-T, Horatio Sanz, Thomas Middleditch, Derek Jeter, Brooke Shields, Rosie Perez, Tracy Morgan, Josef Sommer

Director: Adam McKay

Forest Warrior

LOT Productions, Nu Image Films, USA, 1996.

If you go out in the woods today. You're sure of a big surprise!

Clovis Madison (Roscoe Lee Browne) tells kids a story about Jebediah McKenna, the protector of the forest. (For some reason the character's name in DVD back cover is John McKenna.) In 1875 McKenna (Chuck Norris) is trying to get medicine for her sick Indian wife. Evil lumberjacks are no match for McKenna's martial arts skills so the cowards shoot him. Forest spirit Bear finds him. Bear, Wolf and Eagle give him their powers. Now McKenna is shapeshifting forest spirit.

Jebediah McKenna

Clovis

Hey, in later Nu Image Films production "Skeleton Man" the same clips of flying eagle are used!

Naughty lumber magnate Travis Thorne (Terry Kiser) wants to cut down the ancient trees on the mountains. The kids have a club named "Lords of the Tanglewood." Austene (Megan Paul) has a drunk father Arlen (Michael Beck). Logan (Josh Wolford) and Brian (Jordan Brower) are brothers. The other boys are Lewis (Michael Friedman) and Justin (Trenton Knight).

Travis Thorne

Austene

Logan, Justin, Lewis and Brian

Gas station attendant Barney looks familiar. It's Buck alright!

George 'Buck' Flower as Barney

Austene prays the mountain for help for his father. McKenna hears the wish and decides to help the kids. Next day the kids go to their forest cabin. There they meet bear cub Rags. The evil lumberjacks want to kill the bear so McKenna intervenes and gives them knuckle sandwiches.

Bear cub Rags

The beaten lumberjacks tell Travis about the kid's tree house. Travis remembers his happy childhood playing in the forest. The he snaps back and remembers that he is a greedy businessman and orders Williams (John Dennis Johnston) to destroy the kids' tree house. The tree house blows up while Austene is nearby. KcKenna saves Austene using forest magic.

The kids make "Home Alone" (or "Ernest Goes To Camp") style traps to stop the forest from being destroyed. They also play Rock'n Roll music that makes the lumberjacks dance and play air guitar with chainsaw (?) Right. McKenna helps when the going gets tough. Also Arlen sobers up and finds reason to live again.

This is family film with ecological message and goofy slapstick fights. Chuck Norris is not often seen in a family film. The fights are comical and the bad guys make funny faces when they are hurt, luckily they have the durability of cartoon characters. This is quite standard 1990s kids' film. and not one of Chuck's best films but has some fun moments. Also thecharacter of Roscoe Lee Browne brings some dignity.

Chuck Norris is so tough that he can stop chainsaw with his bare hands, not even Okami Itto could pull this off. Don't try this at home!

Rating:

Average

Starring: Chuck Norris, Terry Kiser, Max Gail, Roscoe Lee Browne, Trenton Knight, Megan Paul, Josh Wolford, Jordan Brower, Michael Friedman, William Sanderson, Dennis Paladino, John Dennis Johnston, Elya Baskin, Loretta Swit, Michael Beck, Wil Shriner, Barbara Niven, George 'Buck' Flower, Carey Scott, Chris Doyle, Jimmy Ortega, Adam Berg, Jolene Kay, A.J. Howard, Dave Mallow

Director: Aaron Norris

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